ravings of a madman...  

there is nothing of substance left for us anymore. they say when you die you  are supposed to walk into the light, the light draws you into what .the fires of hell can shine so bright. enough fire can make it seem alright, but i doubt it..because i just dont know for certain.  i've faced death so many times now and each time its been a mixcd jumble of thoughts and feelings . so i don't know but there is something that doesn't make sense that if there is a god, wheree is he in our hour of need??a lot of old stories and tales, but i cant seem to buy a cart full of apples that i cant see..., sight unseen... 

little did i know...

more of the sane

hi its me again... i am not giving up. im thinking about life and all the twists and turns it throws at us...
there in, if you are smart , you gain wisdom. if you dub't then you might be screwed.. no wonder the neanderthals didnt have the brains to survive...

history repeats

corona virus.... scary thought, but take a look at our history about plagues of the past few thousand
years... plague of frogs, fleas ,boils, and the black plague (bubonic) and pneumonic plague which
a lot of people forget about it... then you have the small pox and measles, yellow fever , dengue
fever , undulant fever, ebola, and now covid 19 , the spanish flu  swine flu , my god its a mess out there. i recall an event in colonial williamsburg,va years where a group of inebriated locals  rolled down
duke of gloucester street in an oxcart calling out "throw out your dead" a revival of the black plague
years that swept the world...just thinking about things

im sorry i have to apologize to anyone who needs it right now. i do not support these killings by the police all over the world.. the problem we are seeing cannot be solved. the police crack heads, and although theree are many police and first responders that are basically good people there will always be
those who slip through the cracks that should never be given a badge and a gun or a baton. back in the
old days police dealt with racial problems by killing and lynching troublesome people of color..
And i say this not to create a much larger problem, but we are doomed to repeat history.again and
again because we are imperfect beings, we will never get it right. thats not how the human psyche works folks. we all want to change things for the better for the future for our kids and grandkids,
that is human nature, but what also is human nature is the belief that we can make possitive change
to those things we dont like . the problem lies in the way we go about making these changes, because we all believe our way is the best way,and no one is willing to give an inch one way or another...

It has to be done this way! that in turn causes others to react in their own interests.. racism has been around since noah was a  messcook and its  not going to be stopped , probably not ever . its wrong , yes, beating a man down into submission has always been the way, or some other type of torture.
having our lord crucified is an example ...the ultimate torture for the time and it put the fear in people
and the terror it brings. thats what the tactic is to take power away from one people and have it taken by someone in order to keep a man his family, his people his nation his race and religious beliefs from being dominant ...its been that way since recess out on the playground  and it will always be with
us all the rest of history.. we cant fight it because its incurable. and its human nature. so we have to decide how to fix something that cant be fixed...we can only treat the symptoms..if at all
but we will never cure the disease itself.. love may conquer all but there isn't much love going around right now , and right in the middle of a pandemic too boot...

corona virus go away never come back

ive found that people are so strange .they start to believe something and then talk about it and in their
minds the thought becomes a truth. kind of like the prez does .if you say it enough it must be truth...

whacko nutjobs out there will believe just about anything if it fits their story line. conspiracy theories are abundant, transmission of covid 19 over the micro wave towers and ovens into everyones homes
are just small examples of what im talking about..so i'm about to take a chance here and speak to the
truth, myself...this disease isnt even close to being over... thespanish flu came back with a vengance in the fall of 1918 and ravaged the world in 1920-21....bubuonic plague wiped out 1/4 of europe in the
14th century and 15th century..so not all is quite as well as the prez sez....he is lacking in a lot of areas
brain cells, honesty and integrity and morality ... ah such trying times we live in..

poop hits the oscillator

covid 19, a real and deadly game changer..stay at home  ,take no chances... good advice, now if we can survive long enough to get back to work, we might be okay  maybe...the big list is long and soe things are hard to find now,  masks, bleach and germ killers , foods and other supplies we need to feel human..

taking stock of materials

hi all , better start a list of things you need.  thankfully i did some shopping just as winter was about to go bye bye.  we always buy sweet potatoes in november. about 20 lbs. worth. we wrap them up in newspaper and store them in a big box and we use  as needed..we got a good bunch this year..
we use a lot of bottled water since our well water is okay, but not great..
dry goods, we stock up over the new year and canned goods are plentiful. we also freeze a lot with our big chest freezer..its a huge beast but it was free so i grabbed it and brought it .its about 8 feet long and as wide as a small pickup truck.. it seems the person who bought it was not happy with the color
white and wanted an olive green one to match her stove and reefer and other appliances..so she donated it to me.. we are truly blessed..
other needs are more difficult now, with the pandemic..my med s and other needs , i don't know how but i'll make it happen...previous proper planning prevents piss poor performance...

gearing up for wshtf

reality can really suck at times..boy don't you know it..it can hit you like a 300mph baseball bat
right between you beady little eyes, so go ahead and face up to it..bad things do happen all of
the time to good people... thats the nature of the beast...  is this the end times? lets take a look ..
famine,  disease , pestilence , and death.. sure sounds fitting doesn't it..we christians as a whole
are well meaning people, but some of them have got the strange notion in their heads that if they place their trust in god, god will provide for their needs..okay i get that.but history tells me a different story
that trusting in god and being prepared for bad times is what gets it done....extra non perishable foods,
cans of soup, frozen veggies , yeast,flour and shortening go a long way in feeding you when things get tight... the food riots havent started quite yet, but soon, ye of little faith....
basics, basics. how many times do i have to write it out for people?
shelter dry warmth and food water and medications and toilet paper, ammo and a good full lighter
and lots of tinder and kindling make for a happy home... don't say i didn't tell you 

survival mode

okay , sometimes  you the bear, sometimes the bear gets you,laws of nature...etc.
lets look at the facts shall we?  we are having shortages of food and other sundries
in the groceries department ,the power has dropped off twice today and people are protesting in the big cities over closing down of businesses.  how long until the food riots start, the economy is collapsing before our eye, and our retirement money has nearly disappeared ....ohhhh this cant be good for anyone
but the insurance and bankers and the lawyers and hospitals,, someones going to have to pay for it...
gather up your ammo,its going to be a hot spring and summer..and the possibility of a viral slowdown and then bam it body slams us in October or november ... like the spanish flu pandemic in 1917-18 came back to kill a lot more people..some people died in 12 hours after contracting the virus from
viral induced pneumonia and organ failure... scary isnt it? and now the us is looking at china really hard about a lab not far from where the chinese claim the virus got started...they lied thats obvious..
so boil your water, roast your meat at the proper temperature and buy emu... or better yet buy me a box
of emu. think peaceful thoughts but keep you powder dry..i will be back later as time permits

survival series continued

some people say i was crazy, maybe, but look at where we were and where we are now...
this covid 19 pandemic is as close to a game changer as ive ever seen,  weve come a long way
in medical science since the last pandemic of 1918 spanish flu. and i haven't posted a blog in
a while... yes, because of personal issues,  4 heart attacks and 5 surgeries later and two eye operations
have done wonders for my health...i can see again thanks to the best eye surgeon in the world,
dr.sanjay asrani at duke university's eye hospital...20/10 vision in each eye,who'd a thunk it?
my heart surgeries well it took them a few years to figure it out..,but i thank god for keeping me
safely through it all,

so lets get down to the tacks of it all....you are now unemployed, no money coming in the rent is due,and your wife is giving you the barracuda eyes and smile...,teeth and all..what do you do?
that's a good question...  you need work, you need money, you do what you have to do to survive..
  you take a low paying job,delivering food in your old beater, and or you go get a job at a grocery  store spraying disinfectant on carts and you go spend hour in line at the food bank..
Or you dig down deep and take what there is  that is being offered and you pray..and you werk yer butts off and get er done...stress will kill you just as fast as anything else, but you got to remind yourself
that you never planned for this situation to happen because you didnt think it was possible to be
caught up in something like this ...stop breathe in hold it breathe out, do this a few times to get
the oxygen to your brains and let the squirrels run wild in that wheel inside your head and by
golly you might just come up with a plan.like making face masks using granny's old singer
sewing machine and looking online for instructions